What is today? Wednesday? No. Thursday. Thursday the what? 14th? No. The 28th?? Oh. Good. I wanted February 7th to close in on me like a pack of hunting lions.
Why, might you ask, is February 7th so daunting? It's just one day. One day where #456 and #458 will be nervously sitting on either side of me while all three of us wait for our turn up on the stage in front of 92 companies from across the country at Playhouse On The Square.
It's audition day.
I'm both excited and nervous. Excited because a plethora of opportunities will (hopefully) be thrown at me from this. Nervous because...well...auditioning is scary. You have 90 seconds to show your potential employers your range and ability in monologues and songs. That's it. Go over, and the timer cuts you off. No mercy.
No big deal. We can do this.
About the same time I give myself a pep talk, I like to start playing the "What If Game!" What if I forget my lines? What if I miss my opening beat for my song? What if I start in a different key? What if I trip going onto the stage? What if I fumble for my lines and go over on my time limit? What if I chose the wrong monologues? What if I don't get any callbacks? What if I get ALL the callbacks? What if I get asked to do the dance audition? What if I totally suck at this dance audition? What if what if what if what if what if....
Before I crawl into an anxious little ball under my desk, I stop and remember that the companies watching me WANT me to do well! They're rooting for me! This isn't like so many episodes of "American Idol" with judges and audience members hoping for a flop. If you're a flop, they can't hire you, and they WANT to hire you otherwise they wouldn't be here watching you and other actors for hours and hours and hours.
Not to mention I'm surrounded by comrades in art! All my fellow auditionees are there because we all want to do the same thing--which might lend itself to some competitiveness--but it is reassuring to me to know that there are hundreds of other people just like me, on the same playing field, pursuing the same dream.
So, to my fellow acting friends who will be joining me this weekend in Memphis for UPTAs, they may seem really scary and nerve-wracking, but no matter what happens, the experience will be good. It will be good. It WILL be good....itwillbegood.
I'm gonna go look over my monologues again...
PS. Let's all get that much needed drink when it's all said and done. Ok? ok.